After reading all about serotonin syndrome at www.mayoclinic.com the night before, I did not waste any time getting Bob to the ER. This time I was ready. They decided to do more blood work and a thyroid test. We waited. They had given Bob a shot, so now he was calm. But I was not. Serotonin syndrome was all I could think about. The only way to get better was to stop taking the fluoxetine.
Thursday was a long day and Bob wanted to keep on the prescribed drugs because he wanted to get better....the relief from the shot of adivan did not last long. By midnight, he was shaking. It was a very, very long night. What was I to do. Do I take him to the ER again? Poor Bob suffered all night long with his "anxiety"...it was so bad by 5am that I called 911. Why? I was exhausted and just did not know what to do and Bob asked me to. When the EMTs got here, they were so nice. They did not administer any drug but suggested that he take 2 more lorazapam. They stayed with us for a bit until Bob got calm. The calmness did not last long.
I called our family doctor and the psychiatrist. After talking with our family doctor, I really felt he too thought serotonin syndrome but he wanted to talk with the psychiatrist. We had an appointment with her at 2:30pm and again, she said it was not serotonin syndrome. She did give us a prescription for 20mg(remember Bob had been taking 80mg a day) of fluoxetine.
I called my employer who is a chiropractor and asked him for some advice. He gave me his thoughts and called his friend who is a pharmacist. The first thing he said when he heard the symptoms, serotonin syndrome. I ended up talking with him for a bit and he convinced me to get on board with what the psychiatrist was saying but to watch him closely. So I did.
Saturday, September 24, 2011
September 14th another trip to the ER
After trying all we had, lorazapam, encouragement talking, deep breathing, we had to make another trip to the ER. The ER doc, Dr. Spencer, asked a couple of questions, saw the meds he was taking and said, it looks like serotonin syndrome. WHAT? What is that? He explained that too much serotonin can cause the symptoms we were seeing. A name, this thing has a name! And Bob was right, he could not control it!! They gave him a 2mg of adivan and the shaking stopped. Blood work was done at the previous visit and this time they did a few other tests.
Bob's psychiatrist was in the hospital and after she had a look at him stated, it is not serotonin syndrome. What?? No, I'm sorry, this now has a name and I'm sticking with it! But I listened. She encouraged Bob to stay positive and keep taking the prescribed meds. Home we went.
Bob's psychiatrist was in the hospital and after she had a look at him stated, it is not serotonin syndrome. What?? No, I'm sorry, this now has a name and I'm sticking with it! But I listened. She encouraged Bob to stay positive and keep taking the prescribed meds. Home we went.
Deep Breathe
Over the next few days I attempted to be Bob's coach to work through the anxiety. Thinking techniques, to baths, to deep breaths. They did seem to have some benefit but not long lasting. What was going on? Things just didn't seem right.
The shaking,jolting,constricting muscles seemed to be lasting longer and longer. Hours.
The shaking,jolting,constricting muscles seemed to be lasting longer and longer. Hours.
September 8th ER Recap
Bob was in great duress. He felt as though it was not anxiety but since that was what the medical community called it, so did he. The staff at the hospital was great and within minutes of receiving a 2mg shot of adivan, he was calm. They made an appointment for him to see a psychiatrist that evening.
The psychiatrist was in agreement with the meds he was taking but did decide to switch up how the fluoxitine was taken. He was to take both in the morning. 80 mg before noon. By the way, that is normally the highest dose given. She added pamelor.
We were exhausted.
The psychiatrist was in agreement with the meds he was taking but did decide to switch up how the fluoxitine was taken. He was to take both in the morning. 80 mg before noon. By the way, that is normally the highest dose given. She added pamelor.
We were exhausted.
Rewind to Saturday, August 27th
Let me just say this before I start, I'm trying desparately to catch up with myself. The past few weeks have been so full of emotion. Bob went through a few weeks of complete mental and physical anguish. On Saturday August 27th Bob awoke not feeling quite right. He had been seeing progress with the depression and Saturday was a bit of a set back. First of all, our dear son-in-law was here with us for a couple of days and Hurricane Irene was gearing up to give a wind and rain.
Saturday though was our PA grandson's 4th birthday and we were going to his party. But about an hour before we were suppose to go, Bob started to shake uncontrollably. I called our family doctor and we discussed what the problem could be. After all my finger pointing to meds, we thought it was probably just an anxiety attack. When I asked Bob if he was anxious about going to the party, he responded, why would I be anxious about that? Our doctor had called in a prescription for lorazapam, the generic of adivan. Waiting for the the prescription to get filled was horrible....I kept thinking about my 4 year old's request that I come to his party early, and how I said, you bet buddy! There I was, standing in CVS with his party to start in 15 minutes. At that moment, I think I started to HATE the disease that was consuming my husband. I wasn't torn with my obligation, I was just sad. But I had to dig deep, say a prayer and believe that my God would not leave me alone with this.
I called my son to let him know what was happening. My son-in-law offered to stay home with Bob so I could at least spend some time at the birthday party. As heart wrenching as it was to leave Bob for a few hours, I thought, when I return he will be better.
The next few days proved to be full of more shaking but on September the 5th things seemed to turn around. Bob was great on the 6th and 7th and was starting to feel as though he could go to work on Thursday the 8th. On the 8th he woke up with muscles constricting, shakes, jolts and just feeling terrible. The lorazapam was no longer working. Somewhere in the midst of all this, the fluoxetine was increased to 40mg twice a day. I remember sitting straight up in bed on night thinking, that is a lot of fluoxetine!
On the 8th we ended up in the ER.
Saturday though was our PA grandson's 4th birthday and we were going to his party. But about an hour before we were suppose to go, Bob started to shake uncontrollably. I called our family doctor and we discussed what the problem could be. After all my finger pointing to meds, we thought it was probably just an anxiety attack. When I asked Bob if he was anxious about going to the party, he responded, why would I be anxious about that? Our doctor had called in a prescription for lorazapam, the generic of adivan. Waiting for the the prescription to get filled was horrible....I kept thinking about my 4 year old's request that I come to his party early, and how I said, you bet buddy! There I was, standing in CVS with his party to start in 15 minutes. At that moment, I think I started to HATE the disease that was consuming my husband. I wasn't torn with my obligation, I was just sad. But I had to dig deep, say a prayer and believe that my God would not leave me alone with this.
I called my son to let him know what was happening. My son-in-law offered to stay home with Bob so I could at least spend some time at the birthday party. As heart wrenching as it was to leave Bob for a few hours, I thought, when I return he will be better.
The next few days proved to be full of more shaking but on September the 5th things seemed to turn around. Bob was great on the 6th and 7th and was starting to feel as though he could go to work on Thursday the 8th. On the 8th he woke up with muscles constricting, shakes, jolts and just feeling terrible. The lorazapam was no longer working. Somewhere in the midst of all this, the fluoxetine was increased to 40mg twice a day. I remember sitting straight up in bed on night thinking, that is a lot of fluoxetine!
On the 8th we ended up in the ER.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
The Other Side Of Depression - What do we do with this?
This illness may have stolen "time" but it will never steal my love for my husband. In fact, it has shown me just how much I love him.
The Other Side of Depression - Episode 1
In our 33 years of marriage, my husband has experienced 4 debilitating episodes with depression and anxiety. Let me give you a background on who my husband is; he is hardworking, he is artistic, he is a songwriter, he is a guitarist, he is a drummer, he is a "keyboard-ist", he is a carpenter, he is a furniture maker, he is a craftsman, he is a good husband....and the list can go on and on...He is a DOER. When he is hit by the Depression, he can do NOTHING.
When we were pregnant with our first child over 32 years ago, we saw the depression for the first time. We were young and just didn't fully understand. After about 3 months of taking Valium, he weaned himself off the meds and was fine. We didn't give the illness a second thought. Our nest was getting ready for our first peep.
Though I was young, there was one thing I noticed when the depression hit. I noticed Bob's eyes. They looked painful. It wasn't so much a look of sadness, as it was pain...pain in the brain. Trying to grab hold of life but just not able to reach. Darkness.
When we were pregnant with our first child over 32 years ago, we saw the depression for the first time. We were young and just didn't fully understand. After about 3 months of taking Valium, he weaned himself off the meds and was fine. We didn't give the illness a second thought. Our nest was getting ready for our first peep.
Though I was young, there was one thing I noticed when the depression hit. I noticed Bob's eyes. They looked painful. It wasn't so much a look of sadness, as it was pain...pain in the brain. Trying to grab hold of life but just not able to reach. Darkness.
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