Rewind to Saturday, August 27th

Let me just say this before I start, I'm trying desparately to catch up with myself. The past few weeks have been so full of emotion. Bob went through a few weeks of complete mental and physical anguish. On Saturday August 27th Bob awoke not feeling quite right. He had been seeing progress with the depression and Saturday was a bit of a set back. First of all, our dear son-in-law was here with us for a couple of days and Hurricane Irene was gearing up to give a wind and rain.
Saturday though was our PA grandson's 4th birthday and we were going to his party. But about an hour before we were suppose to go, Bob started to shake uncontrollably. I called our family doctor and we discussed what the problem could be. After all my finger pointing to meds, we thought it was probably just an anxiety attack. When I asked Bob if he was anxious about going to the party, he responded, why would I be anxious about that? Our doctor had called in a prescription for lorazapam, the generic of adivan. Waiting for the the prescription to get filled was horrible....I kept thinking about my 4 year old's request that I come to his party early, and how I said, you bet buddy! There I was, standing in CVS with his party to start in 15 minutes. At that moment, I think I started to HATE the disease that was consuming my husband. I wasn't torn with my obligation, I was just sad. But I had to dig deep, say a prayer and believe that my God would not leave me alone with this.
I called my son to let him know what was happening. My son-in-law offered to stay home with Bob so I could at least spend some time at the birthday party. As heart wrenching as it was to leave Bob for a few hours, I thought, when I return he will be better.
The next few days proved to be full of more shaking but on September the 5th things seemed to turn around. Bob was great on the 6th and 7th and was starting to feel as though he could go to work on Thursday the 8th. On the 8th he woke up with muscles constricting, shakes, jolts and just feeling terrible. The lorazapam was no longer working. Somewhere in the midst of all this, the fluoxetine was increased to 40mg twice a day. I remember sitting straight up in bed on night thinking, that is a lot of fluoxetine!

On the 8th we ended up in the ER.